world_of_homestuckfandomcom-20200214-history
111514doirlily
GT: Lily walks into the room, guided by Erisio. There is a slightly worrying grin on her face. GA: "hi" GT: "Hey." She pulls out her cell phone. "Got something for you. Little welcome present, you might say." GA: "oh, thanks" GA: "ive got stuff for you" GA: "heres a bluetooth headset and a magic tiara" GA: "whats my present" GT: "Sweeeeeet." She takes it. "This is going to be so much easier than having to go through Erisio all the time. Also makes this hella more convenient." She hands the phone over to Doir. "There's a file on there. If you download it to your comp, it should play automatically." GA: "is it the one that locked down all your devices and made you watch porn" GA: "im not falling for that." GT: "Nah, chill. It's just a video I threw together with Erisio's help." GA: "oh, cool, i hope it teaches me how to make a paper hat" GA: "ive always wanted to know how to do that" GT: "You're out of luck there. Soz." She grins. "Enjoy!" She walks out of the room, Erisio in tow. GA: "uh, bye" GA: Dina takes out a laptop, sits down, plugs some headphones in and transfers the file over to watch. GA: "if this is a screamer youre so grounded" GA: "also, if its a bunch of mushy crap youre grounded on grounds of not being hardcore enough" GT: The video is fullscreen, and loads fairly quickly to reveal Lily in a plush armchair that you think you recall seeing in the living room downstairs, smoking a pipe. "Hello there, father." GA: "hi" GT: "Now, before we begin, I want to remind you that, while you are technically not the man my father was, the fact still remains that you are a hell of a lot like him, and also the closest available target for 18 years of pent-up frustration and slight motherly worry." GT: "Also, blame Merrow. He came up with the idea." GT: She takes a deep drag of the pipe, sending a stream of bubbles floating out of it. "It was pretty easy to modify the lockdown code on the videos Otherdad sent me so his foreword was replaced with a little message of my own. Also, you were like 13 when you started this game, it's high time you saw some of this shit anyways. Plus, you didn't get bowled over with my epic punch. Like, what was up with GT: that." GA: Doir shrugs. "yeah i was completely expecting this to happen and i dont really mind watching a bunch of stuff i put together." GT: "Of course, it wouldn't be any fun just to put you through 8 hours of gruesome sex positions, because that's already been done and you'd probably just grade it on artistic quality or something." She grins wickedly. "No. No, what I've got in store for you is something far, far worse, daddy dearest." GA: "hahah fuck yes i hope its care bears" GT: "I'm going to distract you just long enough for my future self to sneak up behind you and deliver an almighty roundhouse punch." She smiles sweetly. "No hard feelings, but I made a promise." The next moment, there is the barest of love taps to the back of his skull. GA: Dina doesn't even flinch, and attempts to swipe whoever is behind her with the laptop. GT: As Doir turns around, he sees Erisio ducking underneath the laptop swing, looking highly nervous, and Lily, charging forwards with righteous fury. She leaps up, and delivers a mighty blow to his unguarded face, screaming "FOR PROTAGONISTS EVERYWHEEEEEEERE" as she does so. GA: Dina is actually bumped back a bit. "ow, nice." GA: "but did you account for my" GA: "WING COUNTERATTACK!" GA: Dina turns around and whacks them with her large wings. GT: Lily steps back and uses Erisio as the cannon fodder he was always meant to be. GA: "now for my finishing move,,," GA: "TACKLEARBITRIXPOUNCE!" GA: Dina glomps both of them down to the ground. GT: Erisio writhes panickedly in your grasp. "LILY MADE ME DO IT CAN I RUN AWAY NOW PLEASE." Lily shakes her head fiercely. "NO, YOU FOOL. ONLY COWARDS RUN FROM THE FIELD OF BATTLE." GA: "rahhh you cannot run away because you have already fallen in battle" GA: Dina pushes Erisio out of the pile and lies limp on Lily. "your soul is now free" GA: "but this one is trapped under the dead weight of her fathers corpse, forever imprisoned by my heavy armor and wings" GT: Erisio absconds with lightning speed. Lily shakes his fist at his retreating form. "TRAITORRRRR." GT: She falls limp. "Dammit. At least I got one good punch in. That's about all I wanted to do, anyways." GA: "heheh, you call that a punch?" Dina gets up and readjusts her armor, which is now like sideways. GT: "You flinched, admit it," she says triumphantly, still lying on the floor. GA: "i did not. but uh, why did you bring erisio into this? i think we've just traumatized him." GT: "He was the distraction, obviously. I had a masterful plan laid out." She shakes a fist. "MASTERFUL, I TELL YOU." GA: "lily, you used him to protect yourself and had him be the distraction. he almost got whacked with a laptop! you shouldnt treat him like that." GT: "But he's my brother. What else am I supposed to do with him?" She frowns. "Seriously, I love the guy, and I dunno, I'm new to this whole sibling thing. I figured it'd be nice to involve him in the scheme. That's how sibling bonding works, right? You do shit together! Plan crazy schemes! Laugh! Cry!" She sighs. "I dunno. Maybe I should go apologize or something, I guess." GA: "i dunno, im the parent, im supposed to be disapproving of you pushing around your brother. which i am! did you even let him plan any part of this, or refuse to be a part if he didnt want to?" GT: "Well, of course he could have said no! It's not like I was forcing him to do it!" She sits up grumpily. "I just, y'know, cajoled him into it a bit!" GA: "cajoled him into helping attack your father." GT: "Yes, well, I made a promise, OK? You can ask Kolena, she'll back me up." GA: Dina gives Lily a look of stern fatherly disapproval. GA: "i dont even know who that is. what promise? what?" GT: "Kolena's Glissa's kid, and I kind of promised myself I'd punch you in the face for going out with a goddamn heroic sacrifice of all things. Well, I mean, not you you. Other you. Classic flavor you. Or, I guess, you 2.0? Which one even came first, we just don't know. Fuck universes." GA: "you already decked... ah, alright. well, quite frankly, your hook could use some work." She takes out two pillows. "alright, show me your punching form." GT: Lily's form is fairly decent, though she could definitely use a few pointers. "Great idea," she says flatly, "let's teach the blind girl how to box." GA: "punching is an important skill no matter your ocular ability. alright, youre going to want to hold your fists like-" She adjusts Lily's hand positions. "--thiiiiis when you're not punching. it's best for defense." GA: "jack my eyesight and i can show you the proper way of doing a hook, backhand, jab, uppercut, whatever other moves you want." GA: "then you can deck me in the face the proper way" GA: "also, are you right handed? switch your legs. and crouch a bit more, stay loose and on your feet." GT: There's a familiar tingling sensation, and Lily begins rocking back and forth on her heels in an attempt to look intimidating. "Let's do this." GA: "okay, wait, wait." GA: "you cant be doing this in heels." GA: "and you're going to break your hand if you don't wrap it." GT: "Pshh, what, these are flats. I ain't that short." GT: "No thanks to your goddamn genes, I might add. Maybe being part Balish'll mean I'll actually reach average height." GA: "im like, a few inches above average, thats the libby. have you *seen* how short she is?" GT: "Only briefly." GA: Dina takes out some combat boots and some strips of fabric. "here, put these on." GA: She shows Lily how to put on the wraps properly, too. GT: "Hot damn, these are nice. I should have started wearing these sooner." GA: "now, your dress is nice- but you're going to trip over it and snag it on stuff." GT: "OK, well, I can just - " She moves to rip off the lower half of her skirt. GA: "whoa, whoa, slow down there." Dina takes out some fabric scissors. "don't want it to be uneven." GT: "Sweet. Keep it below the knees, though, I like it swishy." GA: "okay." She cuts it mostly neatly. "now, your jacket is pretty good, but you're going to overheat it in. i heard one of the other teams is on a desert." GT: "But it protects me from harmful chemical spills!" GA: "yeah, but it doesn't protect you from heat stroke." GT: "No, come on, I like this jacket. Can we just roll up the sleeves?" GA: "we could just like." Dina rolls up the sleeves and pins them. "there." GT: "Yeah, there we go." GA: She steps back and assesses Lily's new outfit changes. "yeah, youre ready for a fight now." GT: "I *feel* ready for a fight." GA: "what about your wok technique? show me that." Dina holds the pillows up again. GA: "its probably going to be difficult to tell where your enemies are, especially if they resist your eyesight grab. i suggest you get your notice up, so you can listen and shit." GA: "but hit me with your best shot!" GT: "My Notice is literally as bad as it can possibly be," she says flatly, but raises her wok, and swings around for a roundhouse smack. There's some decent power behind it, but she's pretty unbalanced, letting the wok's centripetal pull do most of the work. GA: "okay, nice hit, but you should work more with your blows rather than just throwing them and letting them do it all. also, shift your stance to be a bit wider, and you gotta stay lighter on your feet." GA: "then try again." GT: Lily makes the named adjustments, and there's definite signs of improvement. GA: "much better!" Dina closes her eyes and flits behind Lily. "now, someone is attacking from behind, and you only hear them a second before they get to you. defend yourself!" GT: "Haha holy shit that's disorienting." Lily whirls around and attempts to hit Doir. She's off by a fair bit, though. GA: She easily sidesteps. "alright, that was close! but dont stop and wait, lead right into the next swing. vary your lines of attack!" GA: "combo moves!" GA: "aim for the head!" GT: She lets out a battle cry akin to someone from Street Fighter, and swings her wok up for an uppercut. GA: Dina has both of her arms out with pillows, and stops the blow. "alright! but dont stand still, or i could retaliate!" GT: Lily dodges to the right and swings left, aiming for the side of Dina's head. GA: Dina blocks it with her right arm last second. "good! guide with your arm, force with your body, and push off from the ground!" GA: She also sidesteps to the left, to give Lily a bit more challenge for this hit. GT: With a roar, she comes after her with a sharp left hook. GA: Dina is whacked right in the side of the head. "hah! perfect hit!" GT: She whoops, punching the air. "YESSS. I AM THE TIGER, IT IS ME." GA: She opens her eyes up again and smiles. "patience you must have, my young padawan." GA: "and by patience i mean making people PAY-tience damn girl you are ferocious now" GA: "fuckin up high yo" GA: Dina holds up her hand for the fatherliest of high fives. GT: "Damn STRAIGHT." She high fives him right back with all the daughterly love she can muster. GA: "now, remember, just because you know a bit more about fighting doesn't mean you're a fighter. you can probably make advantages with lore, but leave the optional melee to your teammates." GA: "but if you ever get into a situation where you need to defend yourself, let 'em have it, yo." GA: "oh. and." Dina holds out a Mind Triangle. "here, play this when you do mind things. it'll help." GT: "Hell ye." She strikes a pose with the triangle. "I can feel my badassery rising already." GA: "now. you have one free pow to the face, you've earned it. and a glitter biscuit." She sticks a star sticker on Lily's jacket. GA: (( what was the last thing you got? )) GT: ((11:40 GA: "now. you have one free pow to the face, you've earned it. and a glitter biscuit." She sticks a star sticker on Lily's jacket)) GT: ((and then i said some stuff)) GA: (( kk i didnt see that stuff then )) GT: ((11:44 GT: "I will use its power wisely." She shifts back into fighting stance. "All right, here we go. Third time's the charm." She thrusts her fist forward. Time slows. The world fades to black and white as it continues on its inexorable path towards Dina's face. 11:44 GT: In the distance, faint choral music plays.)) GA: Dina dramatically flies up and lands across the room. "rip in peace, me." GA: "the belt. it is yours, boxing champion." GT: "I'd like to thank all my adoring fans for helping me reach this point." She bows deeply. GA: "punching me in the face has. ruptured my spleen. luckily. because the spleen doesn't do crap. so i shall live another day, but i am forever marked as a boxing loser." GT: "You'll be a social pariah. We'll all look over at you and whisper, 'there goes the spleenless one'." GA: Dina rolls along the floor. "how can i ever come back from this defeat. my own daughter, brutally taking me down in a combat. i am forever dishonored." GA: "i must commit. seppuku." GT: "Father no," she says flatly. "You have so much to live for." GA: "dishonooooor." She takes out her Tectrixcalibur, and slides it through her armpit. GA: "hey did you know my magical girl item was actually something representing sepulchritude which is a mashup of seppuku and pulchritude" GT: Lily slumps to her knees, and shakes her fist at the sky. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO." She draws Ursa Minor and stabs her armpit as well. "I FOLLOW THEE." She slumps to the floor dramatically. GA: Dina's mind-projection pops out. "i am now a ghost, here to haunt all boxing losers forever." GA: "boooOOOooooooOOOOOoooo" GT: Lily sits up, disoriented. "Duuuuuuude, what the fuck are you doing, it's like I've got two bodies.")) GA: "hahah this is just a thing i can do" GA: "yo doiry fenton he was just thirteen" GT: "Oh my god, I can feel your lips moving and it is SO WEIRD." GA: "hahah, what." Dina re-possesses herself, and gets up. "hey, maybe someday i can bring you to meet the escaryogi" GA: "you and erisio both. they know everything about mind. and pages." GA: "but mostly mind." GT: "That'd be sick. I could use some guidelines on these weird-ass powers. Though right now it kinda seems like the most I can do is rummage around in people's cranial spaces. And apparently hitch a ride on your weird brain ghost thing." GA: "well, you are a seer, so it makes sense that youd be more looky than doey." GA: "kinda lame, really, but you can probably pull off some pretty cool stuff with that information once youre god tier" GT: "Sure as Hell hope so. Maybe I can, like, predict people's moves or something based on their mentality and fighting styles? That'd be sick, I should try that." GA: "or youd be able to tell their motives or find out their plans or use their fears and insecurities against them!" GT: "YESSSSS." She cackles maniacally. "NO SECRET IS SAFE FROM ME." GA: "in conjunction with erisio, you'd be pretty powerful. all three of us? unstoppable." GA: "we should get like, triple fraymotifs together." GA: "we'd have enough boonies if we killed your denizen..." GT: "Fuck, man, are we even ready to do that? Like, all our Aspects are still at +1." GA: "well, team maso killed theirs with only three or four people all at like +2, but i heard the herald did like most of the work." GA: "he had like, a one hit ko move or fraymotif or something that could instantly kill literally anything because knight of space lol?" GT: "Hahaha holy shit. Thetz is gonna be hells of OP, isn't she." GA: "idk lmao if they manage to not be killed because of their potential" GA: "jack was just barely able to kill the herald and he had to trick him, and i dont think ive met anyone as stupid or one track minded as the herald." GT: "Wow. That's saying something, considering some of the assholes we've got." GA: "what, whos an asshole?" GT: "Fucking Darmok keeps giving me dog food. Merrow says I should reach out to him, but he thinks I'm gonna kill Acenia or something I think, so I dunno how well that's gonna go down." GA: "why would you kill acenia? she seems pretty nice, though i just bsod'd her... also, she gave me her ylip thing?" GA: "and stop accepting food from darmok." GT: "SHE GAVE YOU HER YLIP." Lily zeroes in on Doir. "GIVE." GA: "what? no, i cant, i have to find out who stole her primer." GT: "NO OH MY GOD DON'T YOU SEE." She's bouncing up and down excitedly. "IF I HAVE A YLIP I CAN MAKE A *NEW* ONE. LIKE, AN OFFICIAL ONE THIS TIME." GA: "lily, have you thought this through? why dont you already have a ylip?" GT: "Because it got swapped with S-sorser's damn playing card thingy in the prototypes. My only other option is to go to his planet and that's..." She looks down sadly. "That's not gonna happen anytime soon." GA: "eeeeeeeeecccccchhhhhhHHHHHH. moral dilemmas." GT: "I'm only gonna borrow it for however long it takes to make another Primer. Then I'll totally give it back. Promise." GA: "look, i dont really... know anything about twink stuff, but i dont think giving you her important twink romance machine is a good idea. you can have the code for it, so you can dupe it later, but i really cant just give it to you. thatd be irresponsible." GA: "and i am responsible father." GT: "Dude, I CAN'T dupe it." She waggles her character sheet. "No grist, remember?" GA: "ah, but i can dupe it. or sami. i think sami probably has more grist, as she never made any weapons." GT: "Blughghghghghghghghhhh." She flops backwards. "You suuuuuuck." GA: "man, i really want to be like 'lmao take it lils hahah' but i feel all... like that's not right. ugh." GA: "help. im becoming a boring ADULT." GT: "Wahaha. The plan is working." GA: "oh god, i chastized you for being mean to your brother, i taught you something, now im refusing to be a bad example... ive become a MONSTER." GT: "It's just your dad powers coming in. Happens to everyone." She sits up. "Soon you'll gain the ability to heal wounds by kissing them and Dad Sense." GA: "what is dad sense" GT: "You'll understand it when it happens." GA: "what does the future hold for this dad. taxes? mortgage? mid-life crisis?" GA: "im scared" GT: "We'll get through this together, Dad," she says solemnly. GA: "clearly, i need to make some changes to reflect this new stage of my fatherly life." Dina throws a jar of piss over her shoulder, and hands Lily her lighter." GT: Lily raises a single delicate eyebrow. GA: "you may have this now, set some fires like a teenager." GA: "i shall only be doing dad business" GT: "Sweet." GA: "hmm. this sparkly costume is no fit for a mature, respectable father." GA: Dina detransforms and puts on a business suit, with an undershirt and tie and everything. "yes. fatherly." GT: "Nooo, keep the costume. It's cool as shit." GA: "i cannot be parading around in such attire" GT: "Pff. You should have seen some of the outfits Dad wore." GT: "Three words: Full. Zelda. Cosplay." GA: "not every dad goes about their dadly business in the same way, lily... do you have a longer name than that? doesnt feel dadly." GT: "You could, uh." She looks sheepish for some reason. "You could...call me Lil-bit? That's, uh, that's a pretty dadly nickname." GA: "only in times of informality, of course. i need your FULL NAME." GT: "Lillybeth Denise Mavico." GA: "LILLYBETH DENISE MAVICO, DO YOUR HOMEWORK. yes, this is perfect." GT: "Oh great," she says flatly. "Seriously, just call me Lil-bit, this is weird." GA: "alright, lilbit. heheh, good nickname, by the way." GT: "Yeah." There is a tinge of inexplicable sadness to her voice. "Yeah, it is." GA: "was i a good dad?" GT: "The best," she says firmly. GA: "then i have a lot of dadliness to live up to." Doir puts on a fatherly hat and poses. "this dad swears to be the best dad he can be." GT: "OK, OK, wait, we gotta make this official." She stands, and gestures imperiously for him to kneel. GA: He does so. GT: She draws Ursa Minor. "Do you, Doirlexander Louise Mavico, solemnly swear to be the best dad you can be, in sickness and in health, 'till death do us part and beyond?" GA: "i do." GT: She solemnly taps each of his shoulders with the dagger. "I now dub thee Sir Dad Mavico." GA: "a father is me." GT: "Yea verily." GA: "also, louise? my middle name is jacques." GA: "or maybe it was thibaut." GA: "thierry?" GA: "emile." GT: "Dammit, universe divergences. You were Louise in this world." GA: "no, wait, i think i didnt have a middle name, so i kept making up new middle names every time someone asked." GT: "Well, you're Louise now. It's official." GA: "well duh." GA: "so what do dads... do?" GT: "Exist?" She shrugs. "I dunno, man, I think all you're obligated to do is bond with me and act as my moral compass, and occasionally show your STERN FATHERLY DISAPPROVAL." GA: "oh shit, my moral compass is TERRIBLE." GT: "Well, you lectured me about Erisio, so that was good. I wouldn't sweat it too bad." GA: "dont worry, ill put a new lump of magnetite in my magnet and get it working again." GA: "wait, do these planets even have magnetic fields?" GT: "I highly doubt the laws of physics apply anymore, so all bets are off." GA: "hmm. ill need to collect surface samples, thermometric info, barometric pressure, gonna need a seismic accelerometer, maybe a magnetron." GT: "Normally I'd say I had you covered, but the goddamn puppypeople stole all my shit, so - " She pauses. "Waaaaait a minute." GT: "Waaaaait a MINUTE HERE, I HAVE A FEEDING TUBE." She pauses, grinning excitedly. "HAD. I HAD A FEEDING TUBE." GA: "good job?" GT: "No, but, like, this makes everything SO MUCH EASIER." She grimaces. "Lemme tell you, I was not looking forward to forcing myself to eat like 20 Doir corpses." GT: "We just have to get all my shit back, and then I can...mash them up and try not to think about it too hard." She pauses. "That's kind of worse, actually." GA: "okay, wait, first of all, all of your stuff got stolen? second of all, what" GT: "Yeah, they even had my character sheet for a while there. Motherfuckers." GA: "okay, tell me *exactly* what happened that caused you to lose your stuff?" GT: "We arrived on the planet, and they just started fucking stealing shit. Tried getting it back, but they've got some damn effective Bambi eyes." GA: "so they pickpocketed you, or they coerced you into giving stuff away?" GT: "Coerced." GA: "uh, you realize youre on a mind players land and they were likely using mind powers, right? GT: "Oh shit, I hadn't even thought of that. Totally explains how that one puppy managed to give me a private showing of his tortured home life when I tried reading his mind." GA: "wait it... seriously didnt occur to you yet?" GA: "come on, lilbit, gotta be craftier than that." GT: "I was kind of busy getting my fucking eyes gouged out, OK?" GA: "er, sorry, okay. now, we need to find a way to combat their crap. any advantages we create on maenam will go to the whole team because hacks, and she's got strong will; we can put tons of advantages on her to try and combat it." GA: "i can also try some advanced mind stuff." GA: "OR: we just kill them." GT: "Or I could just eat one. Though that probably won't be enough, and I really don't want to find out how many puppypeople I have to consume for my fucked-up genetics to kick in." GT: "Besides, that'd only be temporary. Or I guess I thought it was? I guess it can be permanent too if I eat enough." GA: Doir nods. "thats a really good idea. and dog doesn't taste that bad. okay, do that too." GA: "at the same time, the puppies are probably only stealing because they've been enslaved by the mafia adults dogs. so... lets find the denizen, find the mafia dogs, take them down, ask the denizen what to do for the quest." GA: "but why are the adult dogs in the mafia? what purpose do they have for stealing all of this stuff? GA: ' GA: "clearly, the denizen is some kind of greedy ultra-evil one which the mafia is supplying and we need to defeat them or persuade them to stop." GT: "Haha, maybe it's Slim Pickins." GA: "nah, you wouldnt have met the denizen already." (( sorry for the frankenstein log lmao her internet kept cutting out so we'd be rejuvenated for logtimes the next day and this is the terrible patchwork end result so without further ado have some spreadsheet )) (( /spreadsheet )) GA: "well, idk. all ive seen her do so far is slap me and steal my loot." GA: "also, shes deans kid. dean is a fucking traitor and huge asshole pants who went to jacks side and was generally really annoying" GT: "Yeah, well, kids aren't always, like, exactly like their parents. Look at Erisio! He's about as far from a 'traitorous cow' as you can get." GA: "null wasnt a traitorous cow, she was just kind of a dick" GT: "Libby's words, not mine." GA: "yeah, i think thats because she had this whole thing about balish but balish wanted to date null black" GT: "OK well anyways the point is Mari is cool the end." GA: "alright. i respect that argument. i spose its cool till proven otherwise, legally." GT: She nods. "I will accept this." GA: "oh man, speaking of fathers and mothers and dead people, i totally havent asked nathan how his shiz is going" GT: "Pfffff." GT: "Nathan." GT: "That's almost as bad as Doirlexander." GA: "thats not even my name either, but thats totally something id change my official name to if i were eighteen." GA: "and back on earth when uh, that was still possible." GT: "Yeah I was mainly just pulling that one out of my ass. Got no idea if that was actually your full name. Or if you even had a full name." GT: "Welp, Doirlexander now." GA: "tbh i dont even mind, its a kickass name" GA: "doirlexander." He poses. GA: "i feel so majestic, and formal. GA: " GT: "My kokoro is experiencing so many dokis right now, you don't even know." GA: "thats like... weeaboo flirting? dont weeaboo flirt with me" GT: "They're platonic dokis, Dad. Gawd." GA: "well jeez like i know what your newfangled aneemays words mean" GT: "Uguu." GA: "child i will not have you saying the witchcraft words of satan coming through your tele-vee of evil darkness in the form of ah-nee-mays and mangoes" GT: "Pff, you seriously think I watch that shit? I mean..." She pauses, and whips out a pair of red pointy sunglasses. "Just who the hell do you think I am?" GA: "k... kam... i dont remember his name, the dude from gurenn lagann." GA: "thats who!" GT: "Kamina. Kamina is the name you're looking for." GA: "yeahhhhh sorry im not that into anime. i was about to go into my weeaboo phase, i think, but then the earth ended." GT: "Dammit." She considers. "I'm pretty sure Dad had, like, all of the Sailor Moon series." GA: "pfft, ive seen sailor moon. what do you take me for, a peasant?" GA: "ugh. even saying peasant ironically makes my tongue sour." GT: "Eheheh." GA: "hm, you know, the one thing i never got over was how there's nobody left to produce media." GT: "Clearly we must fix this by creating our own windly popular sitcom." GA: "at first, i was down just because i wouldnt have any media. but now i... kinda feel guilty. we were *not* nearly worth the entire human race." GT: "Yeah, I get that. I mean, like, none of us are exactly bastions of our respective culture. Except maybe me." GT: "But I mean, we still all CAME from that culture. If we keep the important stuff alive in our memories, I think that'll be good enough." GA: "actually, i think miloko and tlaloc were. but they were like, troll aztecs?" GA: "im pretty sure aztecs all died out anyway." GT: "We have to pass it down to our weird alien babies when the inevitable repopulation process begins." GA: "yeahhhhh uh. we have less than 100 people. we cant really make a society without a lot of incest happening." GT: "Yyep. Especially with all the batshit sibling chains we've got going on." GT: "Haha oh god am I going to have to shack up with Erisio." GA: "yeah. thank christ it seems like nobody prescratch got attracted to anyone postscratch, or thatd just be soooo weird and make everything real complicated." GT: "I don't want to shack up with Erisio." GA: "oh dear, no." GT: "Also what do you mean nobody prescratch got attracted to anyone postscratch." GA: "cause... wait, nobody did that right" GA: "er, cause thatd make tracking the genetic lines really damn difficult." GT: "I'm pretty sure S-Sorser is rabidly making out with Meouet as we speak, dude," she says flatly. "He was black crushing pretty hard on her last I checked." GA: "oh jesus christ" GA: "okay, well, as long as they dont make babies- wait, isnt sorser HER KID??" GT: "Yyyyyyyyep." GT: "Fucking trolls, am i right." GA: "jeeeeez. i thought we were classier than that!" GA: "i guess its okay for trolls, though." GA: "okay, of the prescratchers, that leaves only maenam as single. and im pretty sure one of her aspects was like, 'romantically oblivious', and maybe she never got over the mailman, so we probably wont have any more gross intergenerational probably incestuous stuff going on any more." GT: "Thank God." GA: "'wow, lily, im your dad but i have absolutely no class so lets make out lmao lmao lmao'" GA: Doir does the mockingest of mocking dances. GT: She swoons dramatically. "Oh Dad, you're so much HOTTER as a teenager. Take me now." GA: "wow, daughter, this is forbidden love so OBVIOUSLY we must do it! blblbalbbalblabbwlbwub these are kissing noises blawblkbjalwd" GT: Lily pitches in with some loud, extremely slobbery smacks of her own. GA: Doir takes out his own skull, long decomposed, and kisses it. "alas, poor doirick! i knew him well." GT: "Technically the line is 'I knew him, Horatio,' but enh, I'll give it to you." GA: "pfft, you think i dont know that? i was just quoting the much more popular quote." GA: "or misquote. i actually dont remember how that whole thing is." GA: "was it a misquote, or was it just made up? i never read that play." GT: "Misquote." GA: "i think maenam was really into shakespeare." GT: "Hahaha seriously? I should chat with her, she seems fuckin' cool. Also she's like my aunt now cause I'm technically siblings with Merrow, so." GA: "shes really into fashion, but i called it terrible once behind her back and after that she didnt really talk to me much. i think i hurt her feelings." GA: "i mean, it was terrible. but i was always supportive around her!" GT: "Well I mean obviously her fashion's terrible, but it's so ridiculously terrible it loops right back around to AMAZING. I didn't think it was physically possible for one garment to have so much concentrated tackiness. I can't get enough of her stuff." She points proudly to the scarf covering her bandaged eyes. "This one's from the Condy. Ooh, if I can get one from Maenam I'll be the first person t GT: o have an INTER-UNIVERSAL SET OF SCARVES." GA: "yeah, i like her fashion! thats why im nice to her, and only say the bad things behind her back. which is actually pretty mean, but eh." GA: "she also might not like me cause of that time i chopped her arm off." GT: "Ahaha, what." GA: "her hand was caught in a thing in jacks temple, and i had this axe that was heated at the front so itd cauterize the wound..." GA: "and i was all, 'hey, we could cut it off!' cause yknow i was a bit of a psychopath at the time and she was like 'FUCKING DO IT OH MY GOD' so i did." GA: Doir sighs, with a smile. "good times." GT: "Jesus. She's metal as fuck." GA: "yeah it was pretty hardcore. actually i gained mad respect for her that day." GT: "Holy shit, yeah. Didn't take her for a pint-sized powerhouse, though in retrospect I probably should've, her being alt Condy 'n all." GA: "well, actually, shes not very strong physically, its just the +4 will. +4 will is best will." GA: "hmm, maybe i should go talk to her. i havent in a while. maybe say sorry." GT: "Wait your turn, jeez." She sighs. "I should talk to Erisio, anyways. Make sure he's OK and all that." She stands. "Talk to you later, Daddy-O." GA: "seeya, lilbit." GA: "do you uh. need help getting to him. or." GT: Her grin falters slightly, then returns in double force. "Nah, I got this. And yeah. See ya." GA: "kk! see you later alligator!" GT: "In a whle, crocodile!"